Mediumship: An overview of my personal experience from early childhood to Lily Dale Part Six

In the early eighties I married.
I was young, many said too young to marry but I was in love and love makes the impossible possible at least that’s what we told ourselves at the time.

We did get some interesting little miracles.
I remember once a Janis, my new bride, was on the phone with a relative long distance.
We were running dangerously short on funds.

This relative told her, “You have to get out there hustle if you want work. Jobs don’t come knocking at the door.”
At that moment there was a knock on our door.
At that time we lived in a one room roach infested efficiency.

Janis went to the door and opened it.
There was a man in a ten-gallon cowboy hat grinning from ear to ear.
We had never seen him before.
He said, “Hear tell you are looking for work missy.”
This was Sunday afternoon.
Work came knocking at our door.

Looking back now I realize why our parents and friends had concerns.
I had only ever worked part-time jobs while attending undergraduate school.
We were both psychology majors which meant that neither one of us had good career prospects.
She wanted to be a social worker or therapist, which required graduate school and I wanted to be a minister which also required graduate work.

I dreamed of the day when I would be pastoring and she would be counseling in a church setting.
I imagined it would be the perfect partnership and the perfect marriage.
Life had a few curve balls for both of us but it was that vision that motivated us in the first days and years of our marriage.

We moved to Springfield Missouri and I attended the Assemblies of God Theological Seminary while she worked at the Assemblies of God Headquarters or what we called “The Blue Vatican,” because it was the international headquarters of the Assemblies of God and because, well, it was blue.

That’s the Blue Vatican below.


We moved from that one room efficiency to a lovely but also roach infested apartment across the street from the Vatican. The seminary, at that time, was located on the top two floors. One floor consisted of classrooms and a chapel and the other floor housed the library. A few years after I graduated the Seminary obtained its own building.

I wanted to believe that I was called of God to the lifestyle of pastoral ministry; that I was being trained, educated, and prepared to serve God’s people, and that God would provide all that I needed to succeed.

That belief would prove to be naive if not dangerous but I would not learn that lesson for many years. Firmly held beliefs however erroneous they may be, cling tenaciously and stubbornly in the face of hard evidence. That is one reason why an open mind, the absence of certitude or dogma or sectarianism is so important.

I find it helpful to always remember that compared to the geniuses of my own generation, my capacity for understanding is severely limited. Compared to infinite intelligence I cannot even presume to begin to understand. So I try not to be dogmatic about anything. Beliefs I once held firm, I have changed in light of new evidence or new understanding.

My Springfield years were my honeymoon years spiritually and martially and while they may not have been wise they were blissful.

But I was different.
I didn’t fit in inside of the Assemblies of God.

When I moved out to Missouri that difference was not well defined but it was palpable.
I didn’t dress like an AG man; I didn’t act like An AG man but most of all I didn’t think like an AG man. Nevertheless I graduated. I earned a Master of Divinity and that degree has served me well. If nothing else it gave me the skills to translate and interpret the Bible for myself with complete confidence.

I came to Springfield a child listening to the wisdom of his spiritual parents. I emerged from Springfield a man ready and prepared to create my own path and looking back now it was surely the path less traveled but where there are few travelers there are few traffic jams.

The spirit guides that have been with me throughout my life were with me in Missouri.
I heard them, at times I saw them, but I struggled to process them, to interpret their presence through a Christian filter.

It became easy to say “God told me” when maybe it wasn’t God’s voice I was hearing. It was easy to think I was under some kind of spiritual attack when no harm was meant but this was and is the Christian vocabulary.

Roman Catholics are used to multiple voices in the spirit realm.
Evangelicals recognize only two sources: God and Satan’s minions.
If the voice you are hearing is not God’s, evangelicals presume it must be an agent of Satan.
Therefore when one hears a kind, still, small, loving voice from within evangelicals are conditioned to call that voice God or the Holy Spirit.

Once I changed my world view and began to discern not only that there are other voices but who those voices belonged to, it was liberating.

God’s voice is authoritative.
If God tells you to do something you better do it. Your spirit guides, on the other hand, advise but they will tell you plainly that they are not all wise and that they cannot always tell you what to do.

Over the years I can’t tell you how many lives I have seen destroyed because they were trying to follow what they perceived to be God’s leading. They may have been listening to fallible spirit guides or they may have been projecting their own desires onto God. In any case, great leaps of faith don’t always end well and I have seen them destroy all faith in those for whom they did not work out.

I am liberated and comforted by the fact that I have many guides including but certainly not limited to one I perceive to be God. But none of my guides, not even God, are responsible for me or for my life, or for the choices I make.

They advise. I take their counsel into consideration but I make my own choice and I alone am responsible for that choice.

More later, for now, much love,

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